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Spring Break Edition: 3 Biking Vacations

"It is better to see something once than to her about it a thousand times."

- Anonymous (now MASTER MP)

Welcome to the March 2022 Spring Break edition of MP which will detail 3 biking vacations. Playlist suggestion: ROAD TRIPPIN' by The Red Hot Chili Peppers.

Before we get to the subject matter at hand, an update regarding Livin' The Fattie Lifestyle, is in order.

Recently, the MAD VIKING (MV) led an expeditionary force on a fattie adventure. MV was accompanied by the RENAISSANCE MAN (RM), and this was his virgin fattie experience. Playlist suggestion: LIKE A VIRGIN by Madonna.

The day was sunny and 28.75 degrees farenheit. Perfect conditions for a fattie ride. MV took the expeditionary force through 10 miles of trails at Deer Grove Forest Preserve - see the December 2021 edition of MP. Check out the new pictures in the Gallery.

RM was very excited during the trip, but exhausted and spent after his virgin fattie experience. Fortunately, SANDERELLA, made all feel welcome at CDC Sud with bubbly x2. Nothin' like livin' the fattie lifestyle! Playlist suggestion: FAT TIME by Miles Davis.

One additional delay before we get to the subject matter at hand and that is an update regarding THE ELECTRIFICATION OF THE NATION. Recently, a very loyal subscriber, and also a very nice person, not always one in the same, sent Management the March 2022 CONSUMER REPORTS (CR) rankings of various e-bikes. CR made some very good points regarding the use of e-bikes:

· Physical Ability:

E-bikes have made cycling more accessible to those individuals that may suffer from a physical disability.

· Cargo:

E-bikes have made it easier for individuals to carry heavy cargo when commuting or running errands.

· Sweaty Mess:

E-bikes have made it so that you can travel to your destination without becoming a "sweaty mess."

If you take the time to read the CR you will note that much of the narrative sounds familiar; that is because it appears that CR may have borrowed from the inaugural edition of MP published in May of 2021 and the special supplemental edition also issued in May of 2021.

"Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery that mediocrity can pay to GREATNESS!" - Oscar Wilde

The great MP welcomes CR's foray into the e-bike realm, but Management at MP has one caution to CR - "STAY IN YOUR LANE." The legal department at MP is watching.

Now to the vacation recommendations. Management recommends that you make it easy on yourself. Use one of the many bike vacation companies who will plan your trip, provide you with your bike, make your hotel reservations and transport your luggage along the way. There are several excellent companies that provide biking vacations all over the world. They include BACKROADS; BUTTERFIELD AND ROBINSON; DUVINE ADVENTURES; REI; TREK TRAVEL; and VERMONT BIKE TOURS.

In this Month's edition we will outline 3 trips, 2 of which Management at MP has personally experienced and highly recommend. The trips are as follows:


· Playlist suggestion:

· Tour Company:


· Trip:



Bike from Prague's Bohemian chic to Vienna's stately elegance. Witness a private falconry show. Add vineyard cycling, touring castles and breathtaking monasteries (one of which you will stay in as your hotel). Finish off at the best hotel in Vienna, the Hotel Sacher. Sweet dreams.

From Mrs. MP:

Bike next to the Danube, drink spectacular wines and enjoy delicious meals, each day is better than the next. End with a crescendo in Vienna.

Check out the pictures of Master MP in the vineyards of Austria.

From Darling Dar (DD):

If you happen to be in Prague on June 27, 2022, go see DD's youngest performing with the CYSO at the Rudolfinum. Then, cycle over to the MuTh in Vienna and check him out again on June 29, 2022. Darling Dar's young man is a prodigy!



· Playlist Suggestion:

· Tour Company:


· Trip:


Wildly chaotic. Blissfully serene. Enlivening and mind-numbingly beautiful. Vietnam is a place you will never forget. Enjoy an intimate journey with color and intrigue, from the tree lined boulevards of Hanoi to the imperial city of Hué, with its centuries old palaces and temples. This trip will open doors to reveal rich local traditions, landscapes and lifestyles.


Exotic and mesmerizing. This is like no other bike trip that you will ever experience.



· Playlist Suggestion:

· Tour Company:


· Trip:


Tucked deep in the southwest corner of Utah, Snow Canyon State Park and Zion National Park are desert wonderlands of vivid red rocks, sheer soaring cliffs, and cool flowing waters. From the stunning views of the Court of the Patriarchs and the Great Arch of Zion to the depths of the Virgin River Narrows, this region's surreal landscape cannot be found anywhere else on earth. Experience this magnificent area by biking and hiking through the canyons and over its mesas.

From Master MP:

A biking and hiking combo second to none. Biking through Zion is the easiest way to get around and see all of the sights. Hiking Angel's Landing and through the Virgin Narrows is an experience you will never forget.

Check out the pictures in the Gallery of Master and Mrs. MP at Zion.


Now to the trivia/quiz section of this Month's edition. Below are ten fun facts about biking. The answers will be on the postscript. Here goes:

1. The first human powered land vehicle was constructed by Giovanni Fontna in: 1418, 1521 or 1677?

2. The term "bicycle" first entered into popular usage in France in the: 1660's, 1760's, or 1860's?

3. The fastest speed ever recorded on a bicycle was obtained by American Olympic cyclist and ironman triathlon competitor John Howard when his bike reached: 97.3 mph, 121.7 mph or 152.2 mph in 1985?

4. Lance Armstrong is the 7th cousin of 2 of the following 3: Katie Couric, Hillary Duff or Master MP?

5. A recent study found that almost 75% of fatal crashes on bikes involved head injuries and 97% of bicyclists who died were not wearing a helmet. With this information in mind and also keeping in mind the third rule of biking which is SAFETY FIRST, bike helmets have been found to be: 65%, 75% or 85% effective in preventing head injuries?

6. From 1990 to 2005 in New York City, how many fatal crashes occurred between a bicycle and a motor vehicle when the bicyclist was in a marked bike lane? 1, 100 or 1,000.

7. How many bicycles can be parked in a single car parking space in a paved lot? 6, 15 or 20?

8. Bicycles currently displace over ? million gallons of gasoline per year by replacing car trips with bike trips. 138 million, 238 million or 338 million.

9. The most expensive bike ever built was Damien Hirst's Trek Madone, commonly referred to as the "BUTTERFLY BIKE," which was auctioned at Sotheby's for $100,000.00, $300,000.00 or $500,000.00?

10. Cyclists are cool - true or false.

TEASE TIME: April is the perfect month to plan your summer biking trips. Hence, the April edition of MP will be devoted to bike trips that will allow you to imbibe along the journey. Playlist suggestion: I THINK I WILL JUST STAY HERE AND DRINK by Merle Haggard.

Until we meet next time: "Don’t count the days - Make the days count." - Mohammed Ali.

Make every day a spectacular journey and remember to R, R & R!

POSTSCRIPT: Answers to the trivia.

1. 1418

2. 1860's

3. 152.2

4. Katie Couric and Hillary Duff. Lance Armstrong only wishes he was related to Master MP.

5. 85%

6. 1

7. Trick question. The answer is anywhere from 6 to 20.

8. 238 million gallons of gasoline

9. $500,000.00.

10. True. A 2014 psychological study found that cyclists tend to demonstrate a unique blend of intelligence, generosity, and the "cool" factor. This applies to all of the loyal subscribers to MP.

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